personal psychic advisor

A lonely frog telephone the Psychic Hotline and asked what his future held. His personal psychic advisor tells. him "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you." 

The frog is thrilled "This is great! will I meet her at a party?" he croaks.

"No," says the psychic, "in biology class."

  

A man is complaining to a friend

A man is complaining to a friend: "I had it all, money, a beautiful house, a nice car, a great motorcycle, the love of a beautiful woman. 

Then it was all gone!" " What happened?" asks the friend. "My wife found out!" replied the man   

Whose Profession Came First

A doctor, a lawyer, and an engineer are going out golfing. They are trying to decide whose profession came first. 

The doctor says, “My profession came first because when God removed Adam’s rib he performed surgery.”

The engineer then says, “No, no, no. When the earth was dark and void God created light. That was engineering.”

The lawyer says, “You’re both wrong.”

The doctor and engineer reply, “Oh yeah? What makes you think yours came first?”

The lawyer replies, “Where do you think the darkness came from?”